


I'm Not Movin' On

by IceBlueRose



Category: Angel: the Series, Veronica Mars (TV), Veronica Mars - All Media Types
Genre: Bit of a mention for Legends of Tomorrow, Crossover, F/M, Gen, Post-Canon, There's a John Constantine cameo too, VMTAP20
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:08:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25048918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IceBlueRose/pseuds/IceBlueRose
Summary: When Veronica discovers magic is an actual real thing, she tries to find out if it's possible to bring Logan back. She's told to go meet The Host.
Relationships: Logan Echolls/Veronica Mars
Comments: 27
Kudos: 34





	I'm Not Movin' On

“Do you believe in magic?”

“Only if it’s in a young girl’s heart, honey.”

Veronica couldn’t stop the small laugh that escaped over the fact that her dad hadn’t even hesitated in his response. 

“That’s what I like to hear,” Keith said, sounding just a bit smug over making her laugh. “Now, why are you asking about magic?”

She thought of the half-Brachen demon, Frank Branson, that she’d worked with on this latest case and bit her lip. She couldn’t tell her dad about this. He already worried about her after Logan...well, he worried. How could she tell him that the supernatural was real? That demons and magic were actual things? 

She couldn’t. She couldn’t bring her dad into that, no matter how much she might want to just so she could have someone to talk to.

“No reason. Saw someone doing magic tricks on the street but they weren’t a young girl so it probably wasn’t real.”

“Ah, well, life’s full of disappointments, Veronica. Like no magic,” he teased.

“Could’ve used it to finally get me that pony,” she joked, making sure to keep her voice even. Just saying the word was enough to make her think of the way Logan had grinned over Pony’s name the first time he’d said it. She shifted the phone away so that she could take a deep breath without her dad hearing then brought it closer again and said, “Hey, Dad, I still have to wrap up a few more things on this case I was working on so...”

“So you’ve got to get off the phone with your old man and do paperwork,” Keith said. “Better you than me, honey.”

“Thanks,” Veronica said. “I feel the love.” She hung up to the sound of her dad’s laughter and dropped the phone, letting it clatter on the desk as she covered her face with both hands. She could feel the sting as her eyes began to tear up and her breathing became ragged with the effort not to break down.

It’d been over a year. Thinking of Logan’s smile shouldn’t make her want to scream and cry.

Except it did. Just like it felt like someone had stabbed her in the chest when she had realized that she was forgetting what his voice and his laugh sounded like until she’d frantically pulled up her voicemail and realized that she had a number of messages from him that she’d (thankfully) never bothered to delete.

As much as hearing his voice and laugh had hurt, the tears she’d cried after had been from pure relief as both became fresh in her memory once again.

She scrambled for her phone, eyes blurry as she brought up her saved files and picked one at random, putting it on speaker. She didn’t bother to wipe away the tears as they spilled over when Logan’s voice filled the room.

“Hey, Veronica. I know you told me your phone would be on silent tonight what with your crime fighting and all but I just...wanted to hear your voice, sentimental sap that I am.” His voice softened. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” she whispered. “I love you too, Logan.”

~*~*~

Veronica knocked on the door and held her breath, hoping that she’d managed to catch Frank at home. A few moments later, she relaxed as she heard the lock flipping.

“Veronica?” he asked, eyebrows drawing together. “What’s going on? Did something come up with the case? I swear we caught all the Fithrazr demons.”

“No, the case is fine,” she assured him, shaking her head. “I just have something I wanted to ask you about. But I’d like to do it inside if that’s okay?”

He nodded and stepped to the side, waiting for her to enter on her own before he relaxed and she remembered what he had told her about never verbally inviting someone inside, even during the day. 

Because vampires. Vampires were a thing to remember.

She was going to have to figure out how to either get Wallace and her dad to never say “come in” to anyone or do the very thing she didn’t want to and tell them the truth about what the world was like.

“What’s up?” Frank asked, gesturing for her to take a seat on one end of the couch as he settled on the other end.

She took a deep breath and steeled herself for the reaction her question was going to get. “Is there a way to bring someone back from the dead?”

Frank’s jaw dropped and his eyes widened. “What?” he gasped.

She lifted her chin and clenched her jaw. “Is there a way to bring someone back from the dead?”

“That’s—why would you—damn it, Veronica, do you know what you’d be getting into?” Frank demanded. 

“So there is a way?” she asked, latching on to the last thing he’d said.

He ran a hand through his hair. “Yes,” he admitted. “But you wouldn’t be able to do it.” Before she could demand an explanation, he continued, “The last time someone managed to successfully bring a person back from the dead was 2001. It’s a dark ritual and some of the supplies no longer even exist. And if they did, you’d have to find someone powerful enough and willing to perform a sacrifice.” He met her eyes. “A life for a life.”

Veronica paled. A life for a life. She’d have to kill someone to take Logan’s place if she managed to find someone powerful enough to do it.

He’d never want that.

She closed her eyes in defeat. “I couldn’t do that. He wouldn’t want to live at the cost of someone else.” 

Frank was looking at her in sympathy when she opened her eyes once more. “If it helps, it’s better that you don’t ever do it. You’d have to rip his soul from its rest.” His lips twitched. “I believe many people refer to it as Heaven.”

Heaven, Veronica thought, fighting not to be sick. If she hadn’t talked to Frank first, if she’d just gone looking for a witch, then she might have pulled Logan out of Heaven.

“Who did you want to bring back?” Frank asked softly.

Her eyes automatically fell to her wedding ring and she swallowed when she heard him suck in a breath. “We didn’t even get to go on our honeymoon,” she said. “He was murdered less than two hours after we got married.” Murdered because she hadn’t done her damn job right. She knew the correct process and she’d ignored it because she was so damn smug about outsmarting Penn Epner and all she’d wanted to do was rush off to get married. Hell, she hadn’t even taken the time to go get a better dress earlier in the day or on the way home so she could change. She’d grabbed that terrible sack from one of the times she’d gone undercover and then gone off to get married.

No wonder Penn had looked so proud and smug even while sitting there in handcuffs. He’d had her and her reactions completely pegged.

“Shit, Veronica,” Frank said. He hesitated and simply reached out, offering his hand. He’d gotten to know Veronica well enough that he knew she wouldn’t want a hug but maybe this would do. A few moments later her hand gripped his, her ring digging into his skin slightly. He stared down at their hands and made a decision. Taking a deep breath, he looked up at her and said, “There might be another way.”

Her hand tightened on his as her eyes flew up to meet his. “What?”

“Not to bring him back. I’m not suggesting that. But there might be something else that could be done.” He squeezed her hand lightly. “I won’t give you details just yet because I don’t know if it’s possible. But I can tell you where to find the guy that can tell you if it is and, if it is, he can tell you what to do.” Frank let go of her hand and stood, moving to the kitchen and digging through a drawer until he came up with a matchbook. He moved back towards her and held it out to her.

Veronica stared at it for a few moments before she took it and read the info on the back. “Caritas?” she asked.

Frank smiled. “How do you feel about karaoke?”

~*~*~

Caritas, Frank had explained, was a safe haven where humans and demons could interact and not worry about being hunted by the other. There was an anti-violence spell over the entire place.

“The Host is the owner. This is a new location for Caritas though. Someone drove a car through the wall at the last location,” he’d told her.

So here she was, at the new location for Caritas which had taken a few years to open apparently, working up the courage to go inside.

“This is for Logan,” she whispered. “Just do it, Mars.” With a small huff, she shoved herself out of the car and strode up to the door, hesitating only a moment before she pulled the door open and entered. 

She’d only taken a few steps in before she stopped in shock. On the stage was a demon singing a Blake Shelton song and the tables were a mix of demons and humans. It was one thing to be told that this was a sanctuary but it was something else entirely to see it. Behind the bar, a green demon with red horns was wearing a white suit with a red shirt, chatting away with a few customers as he made drinks.

Well, if there was anyone who would know The Host, it was probably the bartender, Veronica thought. She made her way to the bar and slid onto one of the empty stools.

It didn’t take long for the bartender to make his way to her and she blinked at the bright smile he gave her.

“Well hello there, cream puff,” he said, leaning closer. “What can I do for your adorable self?”

Veronica couldn’t help it. She laughed and let herself lean forward. It was one of the most ridiculous greetings she’d ever heard despite the simplicity of it. “I’m hoping you might be able to point me in the direction of the person or demon I need to talk to,” she told him.

“Mysterious. I like it. Who is the lucky one you’re searching for?”

She bit her lip. “The Host. I was told they might be able to help me.” 

His entire demeanor changed as he became more serious. “Help you how?”

“I...I don’t know. Frank, the one who told me to come here, he said he didn’t want to tell me because it might not be possible and he didn’t want to get my hopes up.” She thought of Logan and fought back the urge to cry right there at the bar.

She wasn’t some weepy mess. She never had been. (Lie, she thought as she remembered Wallace’s grin that first day they’d met. _“You’re a marshmallow, Veronica Mars.”_ )

Except that’s exactly how she felt lately. Because it’d been Logan’s birthday only two weeks ago and she couldn’t stop thinking about the quiet night in they’d had on his last birthday despite Dick trying to convince Logan that a raging party would be an excellent idea. 

And this year she’d been working on a case and discovering the supernatural world was real while trying to pretend it wasn’t her dead husband’s birthday.

“Oh, cupcake, I can feel how deep that grief of yours goes.” He held out a hand. “I’m The Host. But you can call me Lorne.” 

She smiled a bit and took his hand in hers. “Hi, Lorne. I’m Veronica.”

He returned her smile with one of his own. “Veronica, it’s lovely to meet you.” Lorne shifted so that she’d be able to hear him a bit easier. “Would you like to know how this works?”

Veronica nodded. “Yes.” A part of her wanted to throw out a witty reply but she couldn’t. This was too important.

“The first thing that needs to happen is you get on that stage,” he told her. Her eyes widened and he smiled. “That’s a much calmer reaction than I usually get when I say that.” 

“I have to sing?” she asked, glancing up at the stage. 

“You have to sing. That’s how I help. While you sing, I’m able to...read you, you could say. I see the possibilities of your future. Once I tell you what I’ve seen, it’s up to you what you do with the information.”

She turned back to the stage and stared at it for a few moments.

This was for Logan, she reminded herself and turned back to Lorne.

“Do you have soundtracks in your book of songs?” she asked.

Lorne grinned and pulled a book out from beneath the bar, sliding it over to her. “Knock yourself out, cream puff.”

~*~*~

It felt like it took forever and no time at all before her name was called and Veronica made her way up to the stage and took her spot in front of the microphone.

She took a deep breath as the song began to play.

This is for Logan, she reminded herself and began to sing.

“Wish I could, I could have said goodbye...”

~*~*~

Lorne immediately reached out and gripped her hand, his eyes watery. “You two were supposed to have a long life ahead of you,” he said.

Veronica’s breath hitched. “We were?”

“You were,” he confirmed. “You still could.”

Her hand tightened on his. “Really?” she asked. Off his nod, she frowned. “But how? I can’t bring him back. Frank told me how dark that would be. I wouldn’t be able to. Logan...Logan would hate it if I killed someone just to bring him back.”

“No, your friend was right about that. Your sailor can’t be brought back.” He waited until she met his eyes. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t stop him from dying.”

It felt like all the air had been sucked out of her lungs as the words echoed in her mind. She closed her eyes and fought for control as she tried to imagine it.

Logan, alive and smiling and able to celebrate his birthday.

“How?” she finally managed to ask, grateful that he hadn’t tried to push her into any form of calm before she was ready.

“It’s your lucky night, cream puff. I know a wizard who can help you out. Wait here and I’ll reach out to him to see if he’s able to come tonight.”

Veronica nodded as Lorne let go of her hand and headed towards the back. She watched and took a few deep breaths, almost wishing that she’d asked for a bit of rum in the coke Lorne had given her earlier.

Except that Veronica had stopped drinking a few months after Logan died. She’d gone on multiple benders and then, one day, she’d looked in the mirror and seen her mother looking back.

She’d poured every drop of alcohol into the sink that day and she’d tried to figure out when she’d started getting drunk to solve her problems. When she’d realized that the answer went to before Logan’s death, Veronica had wanted to be sick as she remembered getting drunk and doing drugs and laughing as she’d bought Logan a drink (not that she could remember if he’d drank it but it was the fact that she’d bought it for him at all that made her sick).

It had been the turning point for her. She didn’t think she was as bad as her mother had been—she still drank non-alcoholic drinks after all—but she had still made the choice to start going to AA meetings. Not long after that, she’d started going to see Jane.

If this worked, Veronica decided, she was going to stop giving Logan hell for going to therapy. She was going to continue going to therapy herself—except she was pretty sure she’d have to look into finding one that knew about the supernatural since “I came back from the future to stop my husband from dying and now I’m trying to adjust to that.” was just the kind of thing to say to guarantee that she’d be outfitted with a new straitjacket if she said that to a regular therapist.

Unless she was wrong about the time travel part but how else would Veronica stop Logan from dying?

“Good news, my little cream puff! John is on his way,” Lorne told her as he joined her once more.

Veronica smiled and, for the first time in a long time, felt hope.

~*~*~

“That’s it?” Veronica asked, surprised, as she stared down at the hourglass in her hand.

“That’s it, luv,” John Constantine told her. “Smash it and that sand will take you back to where you want to go. You’ll take the place of your past self and from there, it’s up to you.”

She gripped the hourglass tightly. “No weird ritual or anything?”

“I’d recommend you break it while lying down. Easier for the sand to fall on you that way but otherwise, no, no ritual.”

Veronica slowly smiled. “Thank you.”

He lit the cigarette he’d been holding. “What can I say? I’m a sucker for a good love story.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

He shrugged. “Or maybe I’ve just learned that if Lorne’s making the request, it’s best not to argue.” John grinned at her. “Good luck, luv.” He winked at her then nodded at Lorne. “I’m off, mate. Can’t leave Gary unsupervised for long. He might bring another bloody hellhound back to the ship and then Sara might murder him.” Without waiting for a reply, he turned and left Caritas, tossing one last wave at them over his shoulder.

Lorne laughed. “Well, he’s not wrong.” He turned back to Veronica. “You should come see me again when you get back. Bring that sailor of yours.”

She laughed. “Call him a sailor and he’s going to make a snarky remark about being a pilot.” Veronica carefully slid the hourglass into her jacket pocket. “Lorne,” she said. “ _Thank you_.”

Lorne reached out and patted her on the shoulder. “It was my pleasure.” He waved a hand at her. “Now, shoo. Go get your sailor.”

~*~*~

Veronica thought about when she wanted to go and took a deep breath, hoping that she was making the right choice, hoping that she’d be able to make things better and not just for her and Logan.

She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, gripped the hourglass in both her hands and snapped it over her chest, letting the sand fall on her, and hoped this worked.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from the same song Veronica sings, I'll Never Love Again by Lady Gaga from the A Star Is Born soundrack.
> 
> I left the ending open so it's up to your imagination on how far back Veronica goes. I left it that way because, honestly, I kept changing my mind on what day she'd pick and I finally gave up and decided everyone could imagine it the way they wanted, lol. Hope you guys enjoyed!


End file.
